Waiting for the One

If you put the words “song” and “waiting” in Google you get almost 215,000,000 hits. The songs range from staples like Richard Marx’s “Right Here Waiting For You” and Greenday’s “Waiting,” to classics like The Kinks’ “Tired of Waiting for You.”

It’s estimated that the average person spends 45 minutes to an hour waiting everyday for mundane things like elevators, for software to download, in lines, and for the red light to change while driving. That means by the time you die, you’ll have spent around three hours of your life just waiting for something insignificant.

In my novella, THE BREAK-IN, published by Dreamspinner Press, roboticist Forbes Pohle is waiting for his lover to show up on his doorstep, because a time traveler ten years before, promised he would.

It’s a trope in romance. You wait for the ONE, the only person who’s your destiny, the perfect lover that fits you just right. Of course, that doesn’t always happen. The one true love is a nice fantasy, but not that common in the real world. And yet, when I was little, that’s what I dreamed about. I bet you did, too.

Waiting with regards to love is a curious thing. Psychologists are well aware that romantic love requires impatience as well as patience. When lovers first meet, it’s intense. Every minute spent with a lover is important. Every touch is a caress. During the first bloom of love, you want to get as close to that other person as humanly possible. Sexual tension and the need for intimacy are at its highest. That first meeting, first date, first day, is the one that you remember. It’s where those initial connections are made that mean love, sex, and intimacy in a relationship. Sexual desire is impatient; your whole body is on fire. But that urgency can’t be maintained forever.

As lust cools and romantic love deepens, patience comes into play. If the promise of real, solid, lasting love is within our grasp, then it’s something worth waiting for. If a lover is called away out of town or even out of the country, you might pine but you wait for that lover to return. A temporary delay is just an obstacle to overcome. After all, love conquers all, even time and space.

I chose to write about waiting for love because I know someone that waited, waited twenty years before I consented to marry him. If someone in the real world can wait that long, surely my characters can wait, too.

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